Heart & Hustle

I took a couple weeks off from the social media grind. You might have noticed, you might not have noticed.

With summer winding down (but locals' summer just warming up, coastal Jersey folks holler if you hear me!), I felt the tugging need to stay present in my family's lives and to soak up the rest of August's warmth, sun, and fun.

The last two weeks have also been a whirlwind. We decided after some careful thought and prayer to move Peyton from the school she's been attending for the last two school years into a new school for Pre-K, so that came with a lot of running around, nail-biting, and second-guessing.

I decided to have a yard sale in September, so I am trying to negate the tendency to keep all the things and tackle each room a couple nights a week to collect all the stuff we haven't used in a while. So far I've done the kitchen. That's going really well. (the sarcasm is supposed to be strong here)

And with September coming, I've got a lot of tricks up my sleeve. Lots of fun new groups planned. More content for this space. Pressing forward on a lot of my goals.

And then, the holidays. I know, are you cringing right now? I am. But the reality is this: they are coming. Might as well embrace it.

So basically, I am preparing myself for the onslaught of doing all the things again. School, dance class, Bible study, etc. Ramping up my Boot Camps and free challenges. Brainstorming and writing and reading.

But instead I am focusing more on the heart behind it all instead of the hustle.

I can grind out my work all week, but if I am not coming from a place of love, then none of it really matters.

The running around between school and errands and activities? I am grateful and blessed to be able to do it all.

The messages, emails, Facebook and blog posts?

I am lucky I get to work with and encourage others to live their best lives and make decisions that are potential game-changers for the rest of their lives.

It's easy to get overwhelmed with all the to-dos. The goals. The dreams.

Your hustle is what propels you forward, but the heart you put behind it is what gives it all meaning.

This week, my focus is on the heart behind it all.

Intention: Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

I am a perfectionist.

Scratch that.

I am a fearful perfectionist.

A perfectionist in that I strive to be my best person, put out my best work, and really--be the best.

It's hard--especially because I certainly am NOT always the best. It's a hard pill to swallow accepting you can't be the best at everything, even when you want to be.

A fearful perfectionist in that I sometimes find myself completely paralyzed at moving forward in fear of doing something wrong, failing, making a mistake, etc. If I'm not going to do it 100% right and know 100% of things to know about whatever it is that I'm doing, I am not doing it. I hesitate under I am sure I know everything there is to know or learn before jumping in.

One failure, slip-up, or disappointment is enough to shake my confidence for weeks and set me back several steps.

I have been spending so much time trying to cultivate my weaknesses and turn them into strengths that I was failing to allow my God-given strengths to shine.

And on the other side, I find myself constantly playing the comparison game. If I didn't reach my goal before someone else, I didn't get something that someone else has been blessed with, or WHATEVER...I start to feeling twinges of bitterness, resentment, and disappointment with myself.

It's icky.

One truth I am learning to embrace is that my Creator put me on this earth for a purpose. 
He has endowed me with certain skills. 

He has a greater plan for me than anything I could possibly come up with. 

God makes no mistakes. 

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:13-14 (NIV)

He designed me a certain way before I even existed, gave me strengths and weaknesses, and knew me before my own parents knew me.

So why do I keep fighting against the weakness He has established within me instead of focusing on the strengths with which he has blessed me?

I am blessed with unique gifts.

I am blessed with my own strengths.

My weaknesses are there for a reason.

There are complexities of my reality that He knows and I haven't even figured out yet.

I am who I am as my Father has created me.

I am His daughter, and he loves me as I am, and am beautiful in his sight--because it was His design for me.

Here's another crashing revelation, light bulb, a-ha moment, etc.: there is no such thing as perfect. Therefore, perfectionism is irrelevant in my life. 

There was one, true, perfect human being, and that was Jesus. I can try to be perfect like he was, but I know now that my version of perfect and His are sooooo different. 

The comparison game and my own self-generated feelings of inadequacy, shame, and hurt? 

My own products.

The desire to master my weaknesses, searching for perfection, and coming up short instead of using my strengths to glorify God? 

My doing.

It's time to focus less on me, my, and mine and more on His, Him, those blessings, and His unfailing love and grace.

This week I am giving thanks to God for making me who I am, how I am, and what I am. I pray that He will use me and my strengths in a way that pleases Him and brings glory to His kingdom, and focus on building others up instead of tearing myself down. May I remain obedient to His calling and know that I am equipped with unique strengths and weaknesses just the way He meant to be.

Fitness Friday - Own Your Excuses...and Then Stop Making Them

Excuses used to flow out of my mouth like straight-up word vomit.

(And there you have it; it IS totally possible to begin a blog post with the word "vomit" in the first sentence.)

You could give me some sound reasoning, and I could give you every excuse to counter that reasoning.

But the truth is this: until healthy living became a priority for me, I found every excuse NOT to pursue it.

It's funny though, because it wasn't until I actually took that first step that all my excuses were completely obliterated. And it almost felt silly, because--what was I so afraid of all this time?

Failure?

That it would be just another phase?

I'd be just another New Years Resolution Maker and fizzle out after a few weeks?

I often see an image shared by a lot of people on Facebook, on Pinterest, on Instagram...it's everywhere: 

It's harsh, but it's true.

But to put it more nicely: if we really, truly want something, we should be placing our focus on finding solutions instead of building excuses.

Making an excuse is you convincing yourself that you aren't capable.

Finding a solution is creating a stepping stone to believing you can.

Here are the top five excuses against pursuing a healthier lifestyle I hear (and have heard from myself), and ways to re-route those excuses into actionable ways to move forward.

Excuse #1:

I'm tired.

This one is easy:get more sleep.

Think of healthy living as being multi-faceted: you need to eat right, drink enough water, get moving, and get enough sleep.

Would going to bed an hour earlier each night make a difference? 

I dare you to try it for a week and tell me you don't feel more well-rested.

Excuse #2:

I can't afford it.

A lot of people I talk to are intimidated by the financial commitment participating in a boot camp requires. Or even how much a gym membership requires. 

If pursuing a new healthy lifestyle is a priority for you, consider this:

How much money do you spend on dinners out?

Drinks with friends?

An unhealthy habit that you can ditch and replace with a new, healthy one?

I once joined a gym and wasted over $500 on a membership contract--and only actually went to the gym 10 times. I wasn't ready, 100% committed, and I found every excuse to NOT go. 

It wasn't until I started finding solutions (hello, T25!) that any expenses began to seem more like investments--I was putting money into something that was making ME better.

Excuse #3:

It's hard to work out with kids.

This is a HUGE one for me. You'll see why in a second.

Yes, you are a busy mom. Your kids take up a lot of your time. They should!

But also consider this: you can do something that shows them what it means to lead a healthy lifestyle. 

You can be the point of modeling what it means to take care of yourself. 

You can get get them interested in what it means to get moving. 

In a country where healthy habits are missing for a lot of kids and childhood obesity is a concern, it CAN start at home. And it CAN start with you.

Start with taking family walks after dinner and before bathtime. 

It'll bring your family closer together, AND it'll instill healthy habits in your little ones.

I love programs like PiYo and CIZE because these are programs that my daughter can jump into with me. Sometimes we have dance-offs. It is awesome.

Excuse #4:

I'm busy. 

You don't have time. Our time is precious. I get it.

BUT...

How much time do you spend:

Scrolling through your newsfeeds each day?

Watching TV?

Hitting the snooze button three times too many in the morning?

Start small. Try a workout for just 25 minutes.

30 minutes of physical activity takes up 2% of your day. BOOM.

Excuse #5:

I'm not motivated.

If you are the only person in your family who has decided to make a change for the better, its easy to feel isolated or lonely as you make these changes.

(ask me how I know this)

Really, it chalks up to finding it within yourself FIRST, and then taking the steps to ensure that motivation continues.

Find an accountability partner. Check in often.

Join a boot camp. Then you'll be in a group of like-minded people all doing the same thing you are.

When we stop focusing on our excuses, own up to them, and funnel our efforts into finding solutions, everything can change. If you are only lukewarm about making change, it's easy to come up with excuses. The magic happens when you go all in, and the solutions seem to outnumber the excuses.

And now, three more ways to beat your excuses:

Set a goal.

Make it a SMART goal.

Specific.

Measurable.

Attainable.

Realistic

Timely.

Don't just say, "I want to lose weight." Dig in. Get descriptive. How much weight do you want to lose? How will you know when you've done it? What will it mean to have reached that goal? Is your goal too far-fetched? Is it something you can realistically accomplish? When will you accomplish this goal by? 

SMART goals provide direction. They provide clarity. They are easier to track.

Consider your "WHY"?

This is something I do with all of my Boot Camps--find out and share your "WHY."
Make it public. Put it in writing.

What is driving this desire for change?

What is the greater purpose behind undertaking a new goal?

It's personal. It's motivating. It encourages.

It is a constant reminder of the internal and external forces that keep you going.

Plan, plan, plan.

It's so cliche, but it's so true: failing to plan means planning to fail.

Plan your meals. (click here for tips for meal planning!)

Stock up on foods that fuel your body.

Plan your workouts. Put them in your calendar.

Consider it a date with yourself. Don't stand yourself up.

When you are faced with an intimidating goal, I encourage to you think of this: 

Instead of wasting my energy on excuses, I will focus on building solutions.

Finding solutions instead of excuses doesn't just apply to making a leap into healthy living. This resonates with ALL types of big, scary goals. Once you have a dream, a goal, a fire in your belly that SCARES you, it's easy to make up excuses why it can't or won't work.

The challenge lies in finding the strength within ourselves to take our excuses and transform them into things that propel us forward every single day.